Post-Partum Pet Peeve #12

Okay, so I don't have an "official" list of post-partum pet peeves. But I'm certain there are at least 12. It doesn't get much worse than having people ask when you are due when you're no longer pregnant (it happened to me just this morning). I'm not one of those women who lose the weight/belly fast. I will look pregnant for a long time. I have accepted that fact and though I don't necessarily embrace the residual belly, it IS a testament to the amazing things a woman's body can do. That still doesn't mean that I really want to be reminded that it is entirely obvious that my body has done said amazing things.

But I digress. The actual pet peeve I came to discuss is something different. It's the insult added to the injury. And it's something that is a special treat since it comes along after many of the initial pet peeves are already well-established (and some may even be gone).

I am shedding. No, that's not strong enough. Mega-shedding (uber-shedding? is that still a trendy word enhancer?). My brush gets full of hair from one blow-drying session. And despite my best efforts, the shower drain cannot catch ALL of the hair that comes out in the shower. So even though I pluck out multiple globs of hair (I know, ick) during the course of a shower (if I didn't, the drain would get plugged up and water would start to collect), there are still many strays that get caught under the tub mat, on the tub walls, etc. This to the neverending irritation of my sweet husband, who cleans the tub out before bathing the boys (which he also does - love ya babe!).

I find a hair clutched between my baby's fingers, and try to pull it out. It breaks. I have to pry his little hand open to get it. Occasionally I'll find a hair behind his pacifier (ew). My poor swivel sweeper has tons of hair horribly wrapped around the rotating parts (and this is possibly the case with my Kirby, too). I will have to cut that off with a knife or scissors.

I think I shed enough during one day to feed a small country. Hmm, bad analogy (you can't eat hair). But you get the picture. I can run my hand through my hair at any given time and end up with a nice handful.

One of the most irritating things about shedding is that I get stray hairs on the inside of my shirt, under my bra strap and trapped in the waist band of my pants. This compels me to obessively root around under my shirt/pants to find it as it tickles me horribly until I remove it. I do it without even thinking. I can only imagine what people think when they observe this odd behavior in public.

I might want to consider wearing a hair net in the kitchen. I haven't found hair in the food yet, but that doesn't mean it won't happen (and again, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to eat hair). And we all know how gross that is.

I should buy stock in lint rollers.

And that is my diatribe on post-partum shedding.